I might be one of the worst goal setters, ever. I actually found the sheet of paper that I wrote all my goals on from last year, and I had only actually accomplished, 2. Pretty sad, right? Oh well- we are human and we like to set goals. We rarely reach them, but at least we try to do better, right?
This year is no different! I have goals! And this year, I am determined to achieve them (unlike last year, when I was determined too, but this year, I "mean" it.)
One of my goals for this year is to have weekly FHE- Family Home Evenings. It's been hard with just the two of us, but now with the little one and another one on the way- we have no excuse- since we are actually a "family" now (consisting of more than just the two of us).
I was inspired by our Stake Conference this last weekend. One of the speakers was talking about becoming like Christ and how Christ had an attitude of gratitude. Even Christ was grateful - "Father I thank thee that thou hast heard me." - John 11:41.
I think that we could all be a little more grateful, but I was more inspired by the speaker's invitation to "become like Christ." This got me thinking- if we are to become like Christ (the whole reason we are here)- how are we to do that without knowing Him? Knowing about Him-who He was, what attributes He had? We can't. So in order to become like Him, we need to know Him.
Ward's and Stake's will have a yearly theme. So I decided that we could have a family theme and that our theme could be to "Become like Christ." And then each month focus on one of His attributes that we could incorporte better into our lives.
This may seem like a lofty goal- 12 different themes (because we all know- my goals last the first month- maybe two!) But I figure sometimes the reason I don't achieve my goals is because I don't have a regular reminder- and when you stop remembering, you forget. Thus- the blog! If I write it down and have a place I can regularly go back and check, maybe I will be more apt to follow through. We shall see.
I just thought I'd share- because I do want to stand as a witness. I don't want people to ever wonder if I have a testimony or if I believe in Christ. I do. And hopefully this year, I will be able to work harder with my family to be more like our perfect, Savior.
To start out- I found this quote by Pres. Ezra Taft Benson. He said, "To be like the Savior—what a challenge for any person! He is a member of the Godhead. He is the Savior and Redeemer. He was perfect in every aspect of His life. There was no flaw nor failing in Him. Is it possible for us...to be even as He is? The answer is yes. Not only can we, but that is our charge, our responsibility. He would not give us that commandment if He did not mean for us to do it."
We can do it! We can become like Him, and luckily, we have His help.
So here are the 12 attributes we have chosen to work on for the year. We will focus on a new one each month and focus our Family Home Evening lessons around each monthly theme. And hopefuly, "when he shall appear we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is; that we may have this hope; that we may be purified even as he is pure." -Moroni 7:48
January
Steadfast and Immovable
Being steadfast in the gospel and keeping the commandments.
"Therefore, I would that ye should be always abounding in good works, that Christ, the Lord God Omnipotent, may seal you his, that you may be brought to heaven, that ye may have everlasting salvation and eternal life, through the wisdom, and power, and justice, and mercy of him who created all things, in heaven and in earth, who is God above all." -Mosiah 5:15
February
Loving and Charitable
Learning to love others as the Savior loves them- having charity- the pure love of Christ.
"Wherefore, my beloved brethren, if ye have not charity, ye are nothing, for charity never faileth. Wherefore, cleave unto charity, which is the greatest of all..." -Moroni 7:46
March
Clean and Virtuous
Spring cleaning means cleaning our thoughts and homes- making it a place where the spirit can dwell. Pres. Benson: "Virtue is akin to holiness, an attribute of godliness. A priesthood holder should actively seek for that which is virtuous and lovely and not that which is debasing or sordid. Virtue will garnish his thoughts unceasingly..."
"...Let virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God; and the doctrine of the priesthood shall distil upon thy soul as the dews from heaven." D&C 121:45
April
Prayerful
Heavenly Father is our literal Father- and we should develop a relationship with Him. The only way to do that is through prayer.
"Counsel with the Lord in all thy doings, and he will direct thee for good; yea, when thou liest down at night lie down unto the Lord, that he may watch over you in your sleep; and when thou risest in the morning let thy heart be full of thanks unto God; and if ye do these things, ye shall be lifted up at the last day." - Alma 37:37
May
Repentance and Forgiveness
We can be perfect, but only with the help of our Savior and His atonement. We must be willing to use it on a regular basis to be cleansed. We also need to be forgiving- if we aren't, the Lord will not forgive us.
"I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men." - D&C 64:10
June
Teaching and being Teachable
The Savior spent most of His ministry teaching. It is our responsibility to teach our children. If we do not teach them what they need to know and do, the sin will fall on our heads. We also need to be teachable- humble enough to receive counsel.
"And all thy children shall be taught of the Lord; and great shall be the peace of thy children." -3 Ne. 22:13
Elder Robert D. Hales: "As we teach our children the gospel through word and example, our families are spiritually strengthened and fortified."
July
Patient and Temperate
"And to knowledge temperance; and to temperance patience..." - 2 Peter 1:6
To learn of the Savior's divine nature, we need to practice temperance.
Pres. Benson: "This(temperance) means he is restrained in his emotions and verbal expressions. he does things in moderation and is not given to overindulgence. In a a word, He has self-control."
Two words for me: "verbal expressions". Ya, we need to work on that.
August
Obedient
We need to be more "I will go and do" and less "I will go and do what fits my lifestyle." We need to be obedient in all things, not just the convenient ones.
"And it came to pass that he was obedient unto the word of the Lord, wherefore he did as the Lord commanded him." -1 Ne. 2:3
September
Knowledge
To know our Savior, we must be willing to learn of Him, to study his words and the words of His chosen prophets.
"Learn of me, and listen to my words; walk in the meekness of my Spirit, and you shall have peace in me." - D&C 19:23
October
Humble
We need to be willing to accept direction and lean completely on our Savior. We are nothing without Him.
"And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them." - Ether 12:27
November
Gratitude
Even the Savior expressed His gratitude on a regular basis. We need to have an attitude of gratitude.
Sis. Parkin called Gratitude, the "pathway to happiness." The more we express our gratitude for what we are given, the more the Lord is willing to bless us even more.
"Father, I thank thee that thou hast given the Holy Ghost unto these whom I have chosen..." 3 Ne. 19:20
December
Service
"And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God." - Mosiah 2:17
There you have it! Our Family goal for 2010. Wish us luck!
Monday, January 10, 2011
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
What I Know
I know I make mistakes. A lot of them. The same ones over and over. It's frustrating. It feels like I'm never making progress.
I also know that I'm not the only one to make mistakes. Everyone does. We all trip and fall along this crazy journey called life. Some of us fall harder and further than others- but we all fall.
But more importantly, I know I have a Savior. A Savior who loves me- loves me so much that He came to earth, lived a perfect life and paved a way for me to come home - no matter my shortcomings, no matter how many times I fall or even how hard I fall. No one is too far gone to be outside the loving reach of our Savior. No one. There isn't a "point of no return," a point where we are just too far gone. Elder Uchtdorf said: "Satan, “the father of all lies” (2 Nephi 2:18), “the father of contention” (3 Nephi 11:29), “the author of all sin” (Helaman 6:30), and the “enemy unto God” (Moroni 7:12), uses the forces of evil to convince us that this concept applies whenever we have sinned. The scriptures call him the “accuser” because he wants us to feel that we are beyond forgiveness (see Revelation 2:10). Satan wants us to think that when we have sinned we have gone past a “point of no return”—that it is too late to change our course."
It's never too late to change our course. The only thing we have to do is have a broken heart and contrite spirit. He doesn't ask us to be perfect, not even close to be perfect. He does ask us to try- to turn our lives in the right directon- facing Him. We're still going to trip and fall, skin our knees on the way, but that's ok. If we are headed in the right direction, facing our Savior, all is not lost. All is never lost. As long as we are willing to get back up, brush off the dirt, He stands there with arms outstretched. He will help us try again. And again. And again. That's the beauty of the atonement. He suffered alone, so we wouldn't have to to it alone, if we are willing to accept His gift. But we have to accept it. Apply it. Use it- daily. The atonement is a nice concept, but not if it's not applied to us.
I just felt like bearing my testimony. I know we have a loving Savior. One who doesn't want to leave a single soul behind. He suffered beyond anything I am able to comprehend- all because He loves me. He is waiting for us to realize that His love has no borders, no requirements, no pre-requisites. Just asks for a willingness to try. And with that simple willingness, He can bless us- bless us with faith, knowledge, peace...and forgiveneess. What is sweeter than the gift of forgiveness- the washing clean of our sins- the chance to be whole again- to be worthy of His spirit. We just have to look to Him. After we're willing to look, the willingness to change will come too. I testify that He loves us. That He paved the way for us to come home, no matter how lost we are. He won't give up on us. Never.
Lastly, I just want to add a quote from Elder Holland. He said: "...because Jesus walked such a long, lonely path utterly alone, we do not have to do so. His solitary journey brought great company for our little version of that path—the merciful care of our Father in Heaven, the unfailing companionship of this Beloved Son, the consummate gift of the Holy Ghost, angels in heaven, family members on both sides of the veil, prophets and apostles, teachers, leaders, friends. All of these and more have been given as companions for our mortal journey because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ and the Restoration of His gospel. Trumpeted from the summit of Calvary is the truth that we will never be left alone nor unaided, even if sometimes we may feel that we are. Truly the Redeemer of us all said, “I will not leave you comfortless. [My Father and] I will come to you [and abide with you."
I also know that I'm not the only one to make mistakes. Everyone does. We all trip and fall along this crazy journey called life. Some of us fall harder and further than others- but we all fall.
But more importantly, I know I have a Savior. A Savior who loves me- loves me so much that He came to earth, lived a perfect life and paved a way for me to come home - no matter my shortcomings, no matter how many times I fall or even how hard I fall. No one is too far gone to be outside the loving reach of our Savior. No one. There isn't a "point of no return," a point where we are just too far gone. Elder Uchtdorf said: "Satan, “the father of all lies” (2 Nephi 2:18), “the father of contention” (3 Nephi 11:29), “the author of all sin” (Helaman 6:30), and the “enemy unto God” (Moroni 7:12), uses the forces of evil to convince us that this concept applies whenever we have sinned. The scriptures call him the “accuser” because he wants us to feel that we are beyond forgiveness (see Revelation 2:10). Satan wants us to think that when we have sinned we have gone past a “point of no return”—that it is too late to change our course."
It's never too late to change our course. The only thing we have to do is have a broken heart and contrite spirit. He doesn't ask us to be perfect, not even close to be perfect. He does ask us to try- to turn our lives in the right directon- facing Him. We're still going to trip and fall, skin our knees on the way, but that's ok. If we are headed in the right direction, facing our Savior, all is not lost. All is never lost. As long as we are willing to get back up, brush off the dirt, He stands there with arms outstretched. He will help us try again. And again. And again. That's the beauty of the atonement. He suffered alone, so we wouldn't have to to it alone, if we are willing to accept His gift. But we have to accept it. Apply it. Use it- daily. The atonement is a nice concept, but not if it's not applied to us.
I just felt like bearing my testimony. I know we have a loving Savior. One who doesn't want to leave a single soul behind. He suffered beyond anything I am able to comprehend- all because He loves me. He is waiting for us to realize that His love has no borders, no requirements, no pre-requisites. Just asks for a willingness to try. And with that simple willingness, He can bless us- bless us with faith, knowledge, peace...and forgiveneess. What is sweeter than the gift of forgiveness- the washing clean of our sins- the chance to be whole again- to be worthy of His spirit. We just have to look to Him. After we're willing to look, the willingness to change will come too. I testify that He loves us. That He paved the way for us to come home, no matter how lost we are. He won't give up on us. Never.
Lastly, I just want to add a quote from Elder Holland. He said: "...because Jesus walked such a long, lonely path utterly alone, we do not have to do so. His solitary journey brought great company for our little version of that path—the merciful care of our Father in Heaven, the unfailing companionship of this Beloved Son, the consummate gift of the Holy Ghost, angels in heaven, family members on both sides of the veil, prophets and apostles, teachers, leaders, friends. All of these and more have been given as companions for our mortal journey because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ and the Restoration of His gospel. Trumpeted from the summit of Calvary is the truth that we will never be left alone nor unaided, even if sometimes we may feel that we are. Truly the Redeemer of us all said, “I will not leave you comfortless. [My Father and] I will come to you [and abide with you."
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Thoughts on Christmas
Well, it's Christmas Eve and I am still not quite feeling that "Christmas spirit." It seems that the older I get, the more effort I have to put forth to get myself in that "mood" that goes beyond just the silly presents and centers on our Savior and His birth.
I remember when I was little, that Christmas feeling just came. I got so excited for Christmas Eve, and Santa and presents. I loved buying presents for my siblings and finding gifts for my parents. I loved sitting on my parents bed Christmas morning and opening my stocking. I loved sitting with my family by the tree and opening presents and giving hugs of appreciation after each gift was opened. I loved being with my family- my whole family and sharing in that Christmas spirit with each of them.
Now that I'm married and don't get to spend Christmas with my whole family anymore, I am desperately searching for a way to get that feeling back in my Christmas (especially since I'm also getting ready to start a family of my own) I just want Christmas to be as exciting for my soon-to-be-family as it was for me growing up. I want to make sure that Christ is remembered and celebrated as my parents taught us to do. I just want to find that spirit- and keep it all through the holiday. But what to do to get it? How can you get the true meaning of Christmas to light up the holiday season? Just thinking of Christ? Reading the Nativity? Filling the tree with presents? What is it?
As I was getting ready this morning, I was looking on the church website and found a Christmas link with talks, songs, scriptures and even this year's First Presidency Devotional. So I clicked on various talks and had Joey print them and then I started listening to the Christmas Devotional.
The music is beautiful (as always) and is definitely one way to get yourself in that Christmas mood! I could listen to Christmas songs all day- especially the ones about our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Silent Night, Away in a Manger, Oh Holy Night, Angels We Have Heard on High....all those melodies and lyrics help to lighten my spirits and allow for the spirit of Christ to enter my home and heart.
But it was the first speaker, President Uchtdorf whose message really struck me. I listened to this one part over and over so that I could write it down as he spoke the words. Here is what he said in part of his message on the purpose and simplicity of Christmas:
"Think of the simple yet dignified way our Heavenly Father chose to honor the birth of His son. On that holy night, angels appeared not to the rich, but to the shepherds. The Christ Child was not born not in a mansion, but in a manger. The Child was wrapped not in silk, but in swaddling clothes. The simplicity of that first Christmas foreshadowed the life of the Savior. Though He had created the earth, though He had walked in the realms of majesty and glory, though He had stood on the right hand of the Father, He came to this earth as a helpless child. His life was a model of modest nobility. He had no place to lay His head and He walked ever among the poor, the sick, the downcast and the heavy-laden. Though He was a King, He cared neither for the honors nor the riches of man. His life, His words, His daily activity were monuments of simple yet profound dignity. Jesus the Christ, who knew perfectly how to give, set for us the pattern of giving."
He went on to talk about the Savior's life and how He went about teaching, lifting spirits, healing, offering forgiveness, loving, caring etc., and how that was His gift to all of us. His life was His gift. His example of HOW to live, was His gift to us. Nothing wraped in a package or with a bow. Nothing sitting under the tree- just His open arms, His love.
I was then thinking that there is no way for us to offer what He offered us, to anyone, but then I realized that we may not be able to offer Christ's forgivness, but we can offer our own to others who may have offended us. We might not be able to love quite as completely and unconditionally as our Savior, but we can still love others selflessly with our whole hearts. I can't heal anyone, but I can try to lighten the burden of those who might be suffering.
That was Christ's example. That is what He wants us to learn and do. He doesn't want us to break the bank trying to buy gifts for eachother that we don't need and that will be forgotten by next month. He wants us to love as He loves; forgive as He forgives us, live as He lived. That is what He wants this season to be about. That is what He wants us to give.
I am so glad that I decided to listen to that message. It has already put me in a better mood and given me the little push I need to stop thinking about "what to buy" and start thinking more about what can I offer others? What can I do to help? How can I follow my Savior's example and be more Christlike in my daily actions?
President Uchtdorf close by saying:
"But let us ever remember, that Jesus Christ is the light of the World. May we remember the humble dignity of his birth, His gifts and His life. May we through our simple acts of kindness, charity and compassion, fill the world with the light of His love and His healing power."
I wish I had listened to this earlier, but hopefully I can learn from it for next year at least and the remainder of this season. Merry Christmas!
I remember when I was little, that Christmas feeling just came. I got so excited for Christmas Eve, and Santa and presents. I loved buying presents for my siblings and finding gifts for my parents. I loved sitting on my parents bed Christmas morning and opening my stocking. I loved sitting with my family by the tree and opening presents and giving hugs of appreciation after each gift was opened. I loved being with my family- my whole family and sharing in that Christmas spirit with each of them.
Now that I'm married and don't get to spend Christmas with my whole family anymore, I am desperately searching for a way to get that feeling back in my Christmas (especially since I'm also getting ready to start a family of my own) I just want Christmas to be as exciting for my soon-to-be-family as it was for me growing up. I want to make sure that Christ is remembered and celebrated as my parents taught us to do. I just want to find that spirit- and keep it all through the holiday. But what to do to get it? How can you get the true meaning of Christmas to light up the holiday season? Just thinking of Christ? Reading the Nativity? Filling the tree with presents? What is it?
As I was getting ready this morning, I was looking on the church website and found a Christmas link with talks, songs, scriptures and even this year's First Presidency Devotional. So I clicked on various talks and had Joey print them and then I started listening to the Christmas Devotional.
The music is beautiful (as always) and is definitely one way to get yourself in that Christmas mood! I could listen to Christmas songs all day- especially the ones about our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Silent Night, Away in a Manger, Oh Holy Night, Angels We Have Heard on High....all those melodies and lyrics help to lighten my spirits and allow for the spirit of Christ to enter my home and heart.
But it was the first speaker, President Uchtdorf whose message really struck me. I listened to this one part over and over so that I could write it down as he spoke the words. Here is what he said in part of his message on the purpose and simplicity of Christmas:
"Think of the simple yet dignified way our Heavenly Father chose to honor the birth of His son. On that holy night, angels appeared not to the rich, but to the shepherds. The Christ Child was not born not in a mansion, but in a manger. The Child was wrapped not in silk, but in swaddling clothes. The simplicity of that first Christmas foreshadowed the life of the Savior. Though He had created the earth, though He had walked in the realms of majesty and glory, though He had stood on the right hand of the Father, He came to this earth as a helpless child. His life was a model of modest nobility. He had no place to lay His head and He walked ever among the poor, the sick, the downcast and the heavy-laden. Though He was a King, He cared neither for the honors nor the riches of man. His life, His words, His daily activity were monuments of simple yet profound dignity. Jesus the Christ, who knew perfectly how to give, set for us the pattern of giving."
He went on to talk about the Savior's life and how He went about teaching, lifting spirits, healing, offering forgiveness, loving, caring etc., and how that was His gift to all of us. His life was His gift. His example of HOW to live, was His gift to us. Nothing wraped in a package or with a bow. Nothing sitting under the tree- just His open arms, His love.
I was then thinking that there is no way for us to offer what He offered us, to anyone, but then I realized that we may not be able to offer Christ's forgivness, but we can offer our own to others who may have offended us. We might not be able to love quite as completely and unconditionally as our Savior, but we can still love others selflessly with our whole hearts. I can't heal anyone, but I can try to lighten the burden of those who might be suffering.
That was Christ's example. That is what He wants us to learn and do. He doesn't want us to break the bank trying to buy gifts for eachother that we don't need and that will be forgotten by next month. He wants us to love as He loves; forgive as He forgives us, live as He lived. That is what He wants this season to be about. That is what He wants us to give.
I am so glad that I decided to listen to that message. It has already put me in a better mood and given me the little push I need to stop thinking about "what to buy" and start thinking more about what can I offer others? What can I do to help? How can I follow my Savior's example and be more Christlike in my daily actions?
President Uchtdorf close by saying:
"But let us ever remember, that Jesus Christ is the light of the World. May we remember the humble dignity of his birth, His gifts and His life. May we through our simple acts of kindness, charity and compassion, fill the world with the light of His love and His healing power."
I wish I had listened to this earlier, but hopefully I can learn from it for next year at least and the remainder of this season. Merry Christmas!
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Decions, decisons, decisions.
I can't quite explain what it is about decision making that tends to be so difficult for me. I don't know if it's the fact that whatever choice I make or path I choose to follow (especially if it's a bad choice) I have to take responsibility for it and where I end up because of it. I know it sounds ridiculous. I should be used to making decisions and very used to change. I've been doing it my whole life. After all, I went to college, got married, have a good job etc.--all of which were decisions I had to make at one point or another. I also spent most of my childhood being moved from one state to another or even from one country to another, having to make new friends and adjust all the while. I like to think that I was open to these "transplants" and enjoyed the change of scenery. So what exactly is it, now that I'm a little older and more set in my stubborn ways, that makes it so hard for me to make decisions.
What brings me to one of those difficult decisions is a job opportunity that I happened to "stumble" upon a few weeks ago. I've had my current job for almost 2 years and have enjoyed it for the most part (as much as someone can who doesn't like to work...) I've learned, grown and honed my skills and feel I've become a very valuable employee. The only down-side to this job is that we have our off season--a time when I get very bored for about 4 months at a time. Well, I don't handle boredom well. Yes, any good employee can find something to do to pass the time and continue to be a valuable asset to their company. So, call me a bad employee- you can only read so many tutorials and do so many silly projects, before you decide you've forgotten how to read and just can't take it anymore.
I was never really actively looking for a new job. I'm one of those people who wallows in self pity and complains about their problems, but never really does much to "fix" the problem, especially not if it requires doing something about it. Ya, it doesn't make a lot of sense to me either.
So I happened to come across a job with potential. 'I'll never get it', I figured, which is probably why I called on it and later applied for it. Lo and behold they called me in for an interview and liked what they saw. Weird, I know. That was still ok until they offered me a job. Now I really had to sit down, think about my current position and decide if I was miserable enough in my current job to actually do something about it. Was it enough for that dreaded word...."change." That required thinking... something I also tend to struggle with.
After many failed attempts with the "thought process" and much "pushing it aside" I realized I really did, finally, have to make a choice. I had to decide if I wanted to stay in my current job, be bored and stagnate, or if I wanted to start a new job (which is always a delightful experience--going somewhere where you don't know anyone or what's going on and have to start all over at square). Neither sounded all that appealing, but those were the choices I had.
It may seem like a no-brainer to most people, but for one who was never good at making decisions and adjusting to change, this posed a potential problem, because I couldn't choose neither, because even that would be a decision. (We can try to avoid making choices by doing nothing, but even that is a decision. -Gary Collins)
After much "thought" a.k.a-asking my family members what THEY thought I should do, I knew I'd have to make the decision on my own. No one could make it for me (what a bummer, I know) because this was a choice I'd have to make and then take responsibility for the whatever the outcome.
So I've made my decision and only time will tell if it was a good one. As William Pollard said: "It is not always what we know or analyzed before we make a decision that makes it a great decision. It is what we do after we make the decision to implement and execute it that makes it a good decision."
Hopefully I can do what it takes to make it a great decision.
With that said, here are some great quotes I found on decision making that will hopefully help any of you fellow decision-making "re re's".
Decide what you want, decide what you are willing to exchange for it. Establish your priorities and go to work. - H.L. Hunt
A wise man makes his own decisions, an ignorant man follows public opinion (or his family's) -Chinese Proverb
The more decisions that you are forced to make alone, the more you are aware of your freedom to choose. - Thornton Wilder
What brings me to one of those difficult decisions is a job opportunity that I happened to "stumble" upon a few weeks ago. I've had my current job for almost 2 years and have enjoyed it for the most part (as much as someone can who doesn't like to work...) I've learned, grown and honed my skills and feel I've become a very valuable employee. The only down-side to this job is that we have our off season--a time when I get very bored for about 4 months at a time. Well, I don't handle boredom well. Yes, any good employee can find something to do to pass the time and continue to be a valuable asset to their company. So, call me a bad employee- you can only read so many tutorials and do so many silly projects, before you decide you've forgotten how to read and just can't take it anymore.
I was never really actively looking for a new job. I'm one of those people who wallows in self pity and complains about their problems, but never really does much to "fix" the problem, especially not if it requires doing something about it. Ya, it doesn't make a lot of sense to me either.
So I happened to come across a job with potential. 'I'll never get it', I figured, which is probably why I called on it and later applied for it. Lo and behold they called me in for an interview and liked what they saw. Weird, I know. That was still ok until they offered me a job. Now I really had to sit down, think about my current position and decide if I was miserable enough in my current job to actually do something about it. Was it enough for that dreaded word...."change." That required thinking... something I also tend to struggle with.
After many failed attempts with the "thought process" and much "pushing it aside" I realized I really did, finally, have to make a choice. I had to decide if I wanted to stay in my current job, be bored and stagnate, or if I wanted to start a new job (which is always a delightful experience--going somewhere where you don't know anyone or what's going on and have to start all over at square). Neither sounded all that appealing, but those were the choices I had.
It may seem like a no-brainer to most people, but for one who was never good at making decisions and adjusting to change, this posed a potential problem, because I couldn't choose neither, because even that would be a decision. (We can try to avoid making choices by doing nothing, but even that is a decision. -Gary Collins)
After much "thought" a.k.a-asking my family members what THEY thought I should do, I knew I'd have to make the decision on my own. No one could make it for me (what a bummer, I know) because this was a choice I'd have to make and then take responsibility for the whatever the outcome.
So I've made my decision and only time will tell if it was a good one. As William Pollard said: "It is not always what we know or analyzed before we make a decision that makes it a great decision. It is what we do after we make the decision to implement and execute it that makes it a good decision."
Hopefully I can do what it takes to make it a great decision.
With that said, here are some great quotes I found on decision making that will hopefully help any of you fellow decision-making "re re's".
Decide what you want, decide what you are willing to exchange for it. Establish your priorities and go to work. - H.L. Hunt
A wise man makes his own decisions, an ignorant man follows public opinion (or his family's) -Chinese Proverb
The more decisions that you are forced to make alone, the more you are aware of your freedom to choose. - Thornton Wilder
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
But If Not...
I think I can confidently say that this has been one of the worst days of my life. I've been crushed by recent news of my sweet little sister and her pregnancy as well as some personal battles. But amazingly enough, I think I'm ok. I'm still here, still healthy and relatively happy (as happy as one can be given the circumstances.)
As I've been pondering upon the day's developments and talking to my family and such it's led to a lot of thinking; thinking about faith and why some things turn out the way they do. As I thought about this, a conference talk came to mind entitled "But if not". I read over it again and just felt comforted by the words given by Elder Dennis E. Simmons. I find it reassuring to know that I am not the only one where things don't go quite as planned and am not the only one who struggles with the concept of true faith.
I thought I had faith that all would work out with my sister's pregnancy and now that it hasn't worked out as I had thought, I feel like I didn't have enough faith or that maybe I had faith in the wrong thing, which isn't technically faith then.
Basically, after reading this talk, I've come to realize that when things don't quite work out as I had "hoped" or had "faith" they would, that it doesn't mean the Lord loves me any less or that He isn't listening to my prayers. It just means He knows what's going on and that if I have faith in HIM, all will work out as it should. Not only will it work out as it should, but I can be at peace with it.
This is kinda long, but I wanted to paste his talk in here as my "thought". I hope you will take a moment to read it and feel a little more at peace.
As a young man, I returned home from an eighth-grade basketball tournament dejected, disappointed, and confused. I blurted out to my mother, “I don’t know why we lost—I had faith we’d win!”
I now realize that I did not then know what faith is.
Faith is not bravado, not just a wish, not just a hope. True faith is faith in the Lord Jesus Christ—confidence and trust in Jesus Christ that leads a person to follow Him.
Centuries ago, Daniel and his young associates were suddenly thrust from security into the world—a world foreign and intimidating. When Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego refused to bow down and worship a golden image set up by the king, a furious Nebuchadnezzar told them that if they would not worship as commanded, they would immediately be cast into a burning fiery furnace. “And who is that God that shall deliver you out of my hands?”
The three young men quickly and confidently responded, “If it be so [if you cast us into the furnace], our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of thine hand.” That sounds like my eighth-grade kind of faith. But then they demonstrated that they fully understood what faith is. They continued, “But if not, … we will not serve thy gods, nor worship the golden image which thou hast set up.” That is a statement of true faith.
They knew that they could trust God—even if things didn’t turn out the way they hoped. They knew that faith is more than mental assent, more than an acknowledgment that God lives. Faith is total trust in Him.
Faith is believing that although we do not understand all things, He does. Faith is knowing that although our power is limited, His is not. Faith in Jesus Christ consists of complete reliance on Him.
Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego knew they could always rely on Him because they knew His plan, and they knew that He does not change. They knew, as we know, that mortality is not an accident of nature. It is a brief segment of the great plan of our loving Father in Heaven to make it possible for us, His sons and daughters, to achieve the same blessings He enjoys, if we are willing.
They knew, as we know, that in our premortal life, we were instructed by Him as to the purpose of mortality: “We will make an earth whereon these may dwell; And we will prove them herewith, to see if they will do all things whatsoever the Lord their God shall command them.”
So there we have it—it’s a test. The world is a testing place for mortal men and women. When we understand that it’s all a test, administered by our Heavenly Father, who wants us to trust in Him and to allow Him to help us, we can then see everything more clearly.
His work and His glory, He told us, is “to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.” He has already achieved godhood. Now His only objective is to help us—to enable us to return to Him and be like Him and live His kind of life eternally.
Knowing all this, it was not difficult for those three young Hebrews to make their decision. They would follow God; they would exercise faith in Him. He would deliver them, but if not—and we know the rest of the story.
The Lord has given us agency, the right and the responsibility to decide. He tests us by allowing us to be challenged. He assures us that He will not suffer us to be tempted beyond our ability to withstand. But we must understand that great challenges make great men(and women). We don’t seek tribulation, but if we respond in faith, the Lord strengthens us. The but if nots can become remarkable blessings.
The Apostle Paul learned this significant lesson and declared, after decades of dedicated missionary work, “We glory in tribulations … knowing that tribulation worketh patience; And patience, experience; and experience, hope: And hope maketh not ashamed.”
He was assured by the Savior, “My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness.”
Paul responded: “Most gladly therefore will I glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. … I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.” When Paul met his challenges the Lord’s way, his faith increased.
“By faith Abraham, when he was tried, offered up Isaac.” Abraham, because of his great faith, was promised posterity greater in number than the stars in the heavens, and that that posterity would come through Isaac. But Abraham immediately complied with the Lord’s command. God would keep His promise, but if not in the manner Abraham expected, he still trusted Him completely.
Men accomplish marvelous things by trusting in the Lord and keeping His commandments—by exercising faith even when they don’t know how the Lord is shaping them.
“By faith Moses … refused to be called the son of Pharaoh’s daughter;
“Choosing rather to suffer affliction with the people of God, than to enjoy the pleasures of sin for a season;
“Esteeming the reproach of Christ greater riches than the treasures in Egypt. …
“By faith he forsook Egypt, not fearing the wrath of the king. …
“By faith they passed through the Red sea as by dry land. …
“By faith the walls of Jericho fell down.”
Others “through faith subdued kingdoms, … obtained promises, stopped the mouths of lions,
“Quenched the violence of fire, escaped the edge of the sword, out of weakness were made strong, waxed valiant in fight.”
But in the midst of all those glorious outcomes hoped for and expected by the participants, there were always the but if nots:
“And others had trial of cruel mockings and scourgings, … bonds and imprisonment:
“They were stoned, they were sawn asunder, were tempted, were slain with the sword: they wandered about … being destitute, afflicted, tormented; …
“God having provided some better things for them through their sufferings, for without sufferings they could not be made perfect.”
Our scriptures and our history are replete with accounts of God’s great men and women who believed that He would deliver them, but if not, they demonstrated that they would trust and be true.
He has the power, but it’s our test.
What does the Lord expect of us with respect to our challenges? He expects us to do all we can do. He does the rest. Nephi said, “For we know that it is by grace that we are saved, after all we can do.”
We must have the same faith as Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego.
Our God will deliver us from ridicule and persecution, but if not. … Our God will deliver us from sickness and disease, but if not … . He will deliver us from loneliness, depression, or fear, but if not. … Our God will deliver us from threats, accusations, and insecurity, but if not. … He will deliver us from death or impairment of loved ones, but if not, … we will trust in the Lord.
Our God will see that we receive justice and fairness, but if not. … He will make sure that we are loved and recognized, but if not. … We will receive a perfect companion and righteous and obedient children, but if not, … we will have faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, knowing that if we do all we can do, we will, in His time and in His way, be delivered and receive all that He has. I so testify in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
I love this talk. I think it is a great reminder to put our whole trust in the Lord. I like what he said above that without sufferings, we can't be made perfect. If that's the case, my sister is well on her way to becoming perfect. ;)
The Lord will always watch over us and protect us...but if not, I will still Trust in Him. I trust that He knows what He's doing and that there is a reason (whether known to me or not) behind all that happens.
And to my sweet, incredibly strong little sister: We love you and pray for you and Sophie, always.
As I've been pondering upon the day's developments and talking to my family and such it's led to a lot of thinking; thinking about faith and why some things turn out the way they do. As I thought about this, a conference talk came to mind entitled "But if not". I read over it again and just felt comforted by the words given by Elder Dennis E. Simmons. I find it reassuring to know that I am not the only one where things don't go quite as planned and am not the only one who struggles with the concept of true faith.
I thought I had faith that all would work out with my sister's pregnancy and now that it hasn't worked out as I had thought, I feel like I didn't have enough faith or that maybe I had faith in the wrong thing, which isn't technically faith then.
Basically, after reading this talk, I've come to realize that when things don't quite work out as I had "hoped" or had "faith" they would, that it doesn't mean the Lord loves me any less or that He isn't listening to my prayers. It just means He knows what's going on and that if I have faith in HIM, all will work out as it should. Not only will it work out as it should, but I can be at peace with it.
This is kinda long, but I wanted to paste his talk in here as my "thought". I hope you will take a moment to read it and feel a little more at peace.
As a young man, I returned home from an eighth-grade basketball tournament dejected, disappointed, and confused. I blurted out to my mother, “I don’t know why we lost—I had faith we’d win!”
I now realize that I did not then know what faith is.
Faith is not bravado, not just a wish, not just a hope. True faith is faith in the Lord Jesus Christ—confidence and trust in Jesus Christ that leads a person to follow Him.
Centuries ago, Daniel and his young associates were suddenly thrust from security into the world—a world foreign and intimidating. When Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego refused to bow down and worship a golden image set up by the king, a furious Nebuchadnezzar told them that if they would not worship as commanded, they would immediately be cast into a burning fiery furnace. “And who is that God that shall deliver you out of my hands?”
The three young men quickly and confidently responded, “If it be so [if you cast us into the furnace], our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of thine hand.” That sounds like my eighth-grade kind of faith. But then they demonstrated that they fully understood what faith is. They continued, “But if not, … we will not serve thy gods, nor worship the golden image which thou hast set up.” That is a statement of true faith.
They knew that they could trust God—even if things didn’t turn out the way they hoped. They knew that faith is more than mental assent, more than an acknowledgment that God lives. Faith is total trust in Him.
Faith is believing that although we do not understand all things, He does. Faith is knowing that although our power is limited, His is not. Faith in Jesus Christ consists of complete reliance on Him.
Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego knew they could always rely on Him because they knew His plan, and they knew that He does not change. They knew, as we know, that mortality is not an accident of nature. It is a brief segment of the great plan of our loving Father in Heaven to make it possible for us, His sons and daughters, to achieve the same blessings He enjoys, if we are willing.
They knew, as we know, that in our premortal life, we were instructed by Him as to the purpose of mortality: “We will make an earth whereon these may dwell; And we will prove them herewith, to see if they will do all things whatsoever the Lord their God shall command them.”
So there we have it—it’s a test. The world is a testing place for mortal men and women. When we understand that it’s all a test, administered by our Heavenly Father, who wants us to trust in Him and to allow Him to help us, we can then see everything more clearly.
His work and His glory, He told us, is “to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.” He has already achieved godhood. Now His only objective is to help us—to enable us to return to Him and be like Him and live His kind of life eternally.
Knowing all this, it was not difficult for those three young Hebrews to make their decision. They would follow God; they would exercise faith in Him. He would deliver them, but if not—and we know the rest of the story.
The Lord has given us agency, the right and the responsibility to decide. He tests us by allowing us to be challenged. He assures us that He will not suffer us to be tempted beyond our ability to withstand. But we must understand that great challenges make great men(and women). We don’t seek tribulation, but if we respond in faith, the Lord strengthens us. The but if nots can become remarkable blessings.
The Apostle Paul learned this significant lesson and declared, after decades of dedicated missionary work, “We glory in tribulations … knowing that tribulation worketh patience; And patience, experience; and experience, hope: And hope maketh not ashamed.”
He was assured by the Savior, “My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness.”
Paul responded: “Most gladly therefore will I glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. … I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.” When Paul met his challenges the Lord’s way, his faith increased.
“By faith Abraham, when he was tried, offered up Isaac.” Abraham, because of his great faith, was promised posterity greater in number than the stars in the heavens, and that that posterity would come through Isaac. But Abraham immediately complied with the Lord’s command. God would keep His promise, but if not in the manner Abraham expected, he still trusted Him completely.
Men accomplish marvelous things by trusting in the Lord and keeping His commandments—by exercising faith even when they don’t know how the Lord is shaping them.
“By faith Moses … refused to be called the son of Pharaoh’s daughter;
“Choosing rather to suffer affliction with the people of God, than to enjoy the pleasures of sin for a season;
“Esteeming the reproach of Christ greater riches than the treasures in Egypt. …
“By faith he forsook Egypt, not fearing the wrath of the king. …
“By faith they passed through the Red sea as by dry land. …
“By faith the walls of Jericho fell down.”
Others “through faith subdued kingdoms, … obtained promises, stopped the mouths of lions,
“Quenched the violence of fire, escaped the edge of the sword, out of weakness were made strong, waxed valiant in fight.”
But in the midst of all those glorious outcomes hoped for and expected by the participants, there were always the but if nots:
“And others had trial of cruel mockings and scourgings, … bonds and imprisonment:
“They were stoned, they were sawn asunder, were tempted, were slain with the sword: they wandered about … being destitute, afflicted, tormented; …
“God having provided some better things for them through their sufferings, for without sufferings they could not be made perfect.”
Our scriptures and our history are replete with accounts of God’s great men and women who believed that He would deliver them, but if not, they demonstrated that they would trust and be true.
He has the power, but it’s our test.
What does the Lord expect of us with respect to our challenges? He expects us to do all we can do. He does the rest. Nephi said, “For we know that it is by grace that we are saved, after all we can do.”
We must have the same faith as Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego.
Our God will deliver us from ridicule and persecution, but if not. … Our God will deliver us from sickness and disease, but if not … . He will deliver us from loneliness, depression, or fear, but if not. … Our God will deliver us from threats, accusations, and insecurity, but if not. … He will deliver us from death or impairment of loved ones, but if not, … we will trust in the Lord.
Our God will see that we receive justice and fairness, but if not. … He will make sure that we are loved and recognized, but if not. … We will receive a perfect companion and righteous and obedient children, but if not, … we will have faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, knowing that if we do all we can do, we will, in His time and in His way, be delivered and receive all that He has. I so testify in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
I love this talk. I think it is a great reminder to put our whole trust in the Lord. I like what he said above that without sufferings, we can't be made perfect. If that's the case, my sister is well on her way to becoming perfect. ;)
The Lord will always watch over us and protect us...but if not, I will still Trust in Him. I trust that He knows what He's doing and that there is a reason (whether known to me or not) behind all that happens.
And to my sweet, incredibly strong little sister: We love you and pray for you and Sophie, always.
Monday, October 8, 2007
Experience: everybody wants some!
Have you ever noticed that when you are looking for a job, everyone wants you to have x years of experience? You will hardly ever see a wanted ad that says "no experience required," and if it does, you probably don't want it (sitting and answering phones all day or making cold calls might not be what you're looking for). I find it incredibly annoying that everyone wants you to have experience, but no one wants to give it to you! But I don't just mean this in the employment world - in life in general.
For example, I went to play Racquetball with Joe and my brother-in-law the other evening. I was kind of excited to go and play, but that excitement was quickly sqmashed when I saw that they didn't REALLY want to play with me because I wasn't experienced enough (basically, I wasn't good enough). Every time it was my turn to serve, Joe would return it so hard or in such a way that there was no way I could move fast enough or skillfully enough to catch it. After a few serves (strictly following this routine) it got rather annoying. Both Joe and his brother were not particularly interested in going "easy" on me. Every time they got up to serve, they played while I basically sat in the back corner trying to stay out of their way. After the first game, I gave up and went and sat out so they could play a "real" game and didn't have to play "around" me.
I guess I just got frustrated that Joe wanted me to come and play so bad, but when it really came down to it, he wanted to REALLY play and not "play" with me. He wanted me to play, but didn't want to play at a level where I could improve...only one where I could chase the ball around the entire court, run around in circles or run into the walls. That isn't exactly my idea of fun. I love to play when I can play those at my level, but not when I don't get to participate.
After I decided to sit out, it got me thinking about why they wouldn't let me play (well, they didn't TELL me I couldn't play, they SHOWED me they didn't WANT me to play). Joe wanted someone to play with, but only someone who was at his level (his brother). Did he want to help me get to his level? No, not really. He just wanted to play his brother or play me in a way where he got to watch me chase the ball around (I think this was his was of "proving" that he was better than me--our points always had to be 2 to 15 or so). He wanted to hit the ball hard and in a manner I'm not used to (I'm still learning where that silly little ball bounces after it hits various spots on the wall).
After I thought about this, it made me realize the world is JUST like that! The world is just like my mean-racquetball-hitting-husband!
I remember applying for the job I have now. They didn't want to hire me because I didn't have any experience (I had never sat in front of a computer typing blog entries all day!) They finally hired me when they realized how cheap I would be since I did lack the experience they were searching for. Since I didn't have experience, they didn't have to pay me the average wage for someone applying for my position. I'm very grateful they gave me the position and are still giving me the experience I lacked, but I still consider myself lucky to have 'earned' it even though I lacked the experience.
I guess it just seems wrong to me that this is the way the world works.
It actually reminds me of a line from my patriarchal blessing. It said that some of the things I'd go through in life would give me experience and greater understanding. Not necessarily experience in the working world, but in my personal life (whatever that may be). I guess you could say it gives me hope to know that the experiences I go through now, will give me greater experience and learning- whether that be learning to help my husband, or gaining experience to help me to someday raise and teach my children, or even to strengthen my testimony and give me experience in standing steadfast and immoveable.
Not everyone wants to GIVE you experience, but that doesn't mean you can't obtain it on your own. I think that is what I've learned through this. You can't always rely on others to teach you or give you that experience, sometimes you just have to do the best you can and hopefully learn along the way. You need to put forth the effort yourself (get help when you can!) and learn from those experiences placed before you. Not just learn, but put into action.
That was my great "learning experience" from the other evening. I seem to learn a lot from being frustrated--it's the only way I feel strongly enough to change something!
“After awhile you learn that what you really are is all the experiences and all the thoughts you've ever had and all the people who have touched your life, no matter how briefly.” -unknown
“The hardest part about growing up is letting go with what you have been accustomed to and moving on with something that you haven't experienced yet.” -unknown
“People grow through experience if they meet life honestly and courageously. This is how character is built.” -Eleanor Roosevelt
For example, I went to play Racquetball with Joe and my brother-in-law the other evening. I was kind of excited to go and play, but that excitement was quickly sqmashed when I saw that they didn't REALLY want to play with me because I wasn't experienced enough (basically, I wasn't good enough). Every time it was my turn to serve, Joe would return it so hard or in such a way that there was no way I could move fast enough or skillfully enough to catch it. After a few serves (strictly following this routine) it got rather annoying. Both Joe and his brother were not particularly interested in going "easy" on me. Every time they got up to serve, they played while I basically sat in the back corner trying to stay out of their way. After the first game, I gave up and went and sat out so they could play a "real" game and didn't have to play "around" me.
I guess I just got frustrated that Joe wanted me to come and play so bad, but when it really came down to it, he wanted to REALLY play and not "play" with me. He wanted me to play, but didn't want to play at a level where I could improve...only one where I could chase the ball around the entire court, run around in circles or run into the walls. That isn't exactly my idea of fun. I love to play when I can play those at my level, but not when I don't get to participate.
After I decided to sit out, it got me thinking about why they wouldn't let me play (well, they didn't TELL me I couldn't play, they SHOWED me they didn't WANT me to play). Joe wanted someone to play with, but only someone who was at his level (his brother). Did he want to help me get to his level? No, not really. He just wanted to play his brother or play me in a way where he got to watch me chase the ball around (I think this was his was of "proving" that he was better than me--our points always had to be 2 to 15 or so). He wanted to hit the ball hard and in a manner I'm not used to (I'm still learning where that silly little ball bounces after it hits various spots on the wall).
After I thought about this, it made me realize the world is JUST like that! The world is just like my mean-racquetball-hitting-husband!
I remember applying for the job I have now. They didn't want to hire me because I didn't have any experience (I had never sat in front of a computer typing blog entries all day!) They finally hired me when they realized how cheap I would be since I did lack the experience they were searching for. Since I didn't have experience, they didn't have to pay me the average wage for someone applying for my position. I'm very grateful they gave me the position and are still giving me the experience I lacked, but I still consider myself lucky to have 'earned' it even though I lacked the experience.
I guess it just seems wrong to me that this is the way the world works.
It actually reminds me of a line from my patriarchal blessing. It said that some of the things I'd go through in life would give me experience and greater understanding. Not necessarily experience in the working world, but in my personal life (whatever that may be). I guess you could say it gives me hope to know that the experiences I go through now, will give me greater experience and learning- whether that be learning to help my husband, or gaining experience to help me to someday raise and teach my children, or even to strengthen my testimony and give me experience in standing steadfast and immoveable.
Not everyone wants to GIVE you experience, but that doesn't mean you can't obtain it on your own. I think that is what I've learned through this. You can't always rely on others to teach you or give you that experience, sometimes you just have to do the best you can and hopefully learn along the way. You need to put forth the effort yourself (get help when you can!) and learn from those experiences placed before you. Not just learn, but put into action.
That was my great "learning experience" from the other evening. I seem to learn a lot from being frustrated--it's the only way I feel strongly enough to change something!
“After awhile you learn that what you really are is all the experiences and all the thoughts you've ever had and all the people who have touched your life, no matter how briefly.” -unknown
“The hardest part about growing up is letting go with what you have been accustomed to and moving on with something that you haven't experienced yet.” -unknown
“People grow through experience if they meet life honestly and courageously. This is how character is built.” -Eleanor Roosevelt
Thursday, July 12, 2007
Freedom
I found a great quote on being "free" which helped me to decide it would be appropriate to write a blog on "freedom" especially since we just celebrated the anniversary of establishing true freedom in our country.
But I don't necessarily want to talk about freedom of speech or religion or anything included in the 5th amendment. Don't get me wrong, those are incredible freedoms, which I am grateful to have. I more want to talk about freedom of character, freedom of mind. Being free to be me. Basically, not being tied down. Part of what led me to this topic is the fact that I have not felt "free" the last little while.
I've been having the hardest time learning to "grow up." I just got out of college and have been working since then. I've had this job for a year (longer than I've ever had any job before). But I'm not used to working so much. All through college I held a job, but worked part time. During the summers, I worked if it was convenient (and was poor). Once summer was over, I got a break from work and went back to school. Once school became overly boring, I returned to work for a short period and filled the space with vacations and play time again. Only problem now is that school is over. Once my schooling ended, so did spontaneity.
I no longer have the freedom to float from school to work to vacation. I am now required to clear my "freedom" with my boss. I find myself sinking into minor depression, being stuck in the "daily grind". Happiness is no longer something so simple to find. It is amazing how sad life becomes without freedom. I don't understand how most people spend their lives working!
Growing up is the hardest thing I've ever really had to do. Being responsible for all my choices and being responsible to other people is definitely taking it's toll on me. In school if I didn't complete my work, it only effected me. Now, if I don't complete an assignment, it effects my boss, my co-workers, my clients etc.
Basically I'm having to find other ways to be happy. I'm having to find ways to "enjoy" work. I'm still working on it, that's for certain! Hopefully one of these days I will be able to master my moods and emotions. Hopefully I will learn to find my role in life and learn to be content. Things are not as they always were and they will continue to change. Responsibilities will change. People will change. Life is constantly changing. It's funny, I used to LOVE change. Loved moving, meeting new people, changing jobs, switching majors etc. Now it seems you get comfortable where you are, and then don't like the changes.
Life is one of those things you will never master. You can only work on it, every day. Hopefully I will master the realization that I will never master life--only master my emotions. And once I have those under control, the rest should be simple.
"Concern should drive us into action and not into a depression. No man is free who cannot control himself." --Pythagoras
"The secret of Happiness is Freedom, and the secret of Freedom, courage." -Thucydides
"Freedom means the opportunity to be what we never thought we would be." -Daniel J. Boorstin
And lastly,
"Freedom is not procured by a full enjoyment of what is desired, but by controlling the desire." -Epictetus
But I don't necessarily want to talk about freedom of speech or religion or anything included in the 5th amendment. Don't get me wrong, those are incredible freedoms, which I am grateful to have. I more want to talk about freedom of character, freedom of mind. Being free to be me. Basically, not being tied down. Part of what led me to this topic is the fact that I have not felt "free" the last little while.
I've been having the hardest time learning to "grow up." I just got out of college and have been working since then. I've had this job for a year (longer than I've ever had any job before). But I'm not used to working so much. All through college I held a job, but worked part time. During the summers, I worked if it was convenient (and was poor). Once summer was over, I got a break from work and went back to school. Once school became overly boring, I returned to work for a short period and filled the space with vacations and play time again. Only problem now is that school is over. Once my schooling ended, so did spontaneity.
I no longer have the freedom to float from school to work to vacation. I am now required to clear my "freedom" with my boss. I find myself sinking into minor depression, being stuck in the "daily grind". Happiness is no longer something so simple to find. It is amazing how sad life becomes without freedom. I don't understand how most people spend their lives working!
Growing up is the hardest thing I've ever really had to do. Being responsible for all my choices and being responsible to other people is definitely taking it's toll on me. In school if I didn't complete my work, it only effected me. Now, if I don't complete an assignment, it effects my boss, my co-workers, my clients etc.
Basically I'm having to find other ways to be happy. I'm having to find ways to "enjoy" work. I'm still working on it, that's for certain! Hopefully one of these days I will be able to master my moods and emotions. Hopefully I will learn to find my role in life and learn to be content. Things are not as they always were and they will continue to change. Responsibilities will change. People will change. Life is constantly changing. It's funny, I used to LOVE change. Loved moving, meeting new people, changing jobs, switching majors etc. Now it seems you get comfortable where you are, and then don't like the changes.
Life is one of those things you will never master. You can only work on it, every day. Hopefully I will master the realization that I will never master life--only master my emotions. And once I have those under control, the rest should be simple.
"Concern should drive us into action and not into a depression. No man is free who cannot control himself." --Pythagoras
"The secret of Happiness is Freedom, and the secret of Freedom, courage." -Thucydides
"Freedom means the opportunity to be what we never thought we would be." -Daniel J. Boorstin
And lastly,
"Freedom is not procured by a full enjoyment of what is desired, but by controlling the desire." -Epictetus
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